I knew it was going to happen soon. The last time we were together, here in Montreal she told me. "I just want to let you know...we'll be trying soon."
.... blank stare....
"For a BABY Ashley."
I'm not going to lie. I'll be super honest. I was sad at first. Selfishly, I guess. I'm a selfish friend. The friend who wants a bit of undivided attention from those whom I love most. But who doesn't? The friend who wishes she could go back to 'the way things were.' You see, this world tears friendships apart. Whether it be distance, work or just 'life' in general. It is WORK to keep relationships going. And not only did she and I both move to different provinces, marry our husbands and start new lives, we're not the type to weekly pick up the phone and call. I don't know why, but perhaps again, it's that silly thing called 'life' that tangles the lines of communication.
So when I knew she was soon to be with child, I realized that more was needed on my part. More effort, more attention. Well if it were a class subject, I'd probably receive a -C. Shameful, I know. What happened? Why all of a sudden do I find it so difficult? We were inseparable in New Brunswick. I practically lived with her. We were care-free singing the Dixie Chicks with the windows rolled down. We cried tears on each others pillows, bidding sad adieu's to past heartbreaks and then pick ourselves up, head out to the local brewery, and enjoy a pizza and a pint. Do I wish I could go back? Yes. Absolutely. To fully appreciate what we had then. To tell her, "April, this moment here- this would never be without you." To say thank you for those years.
Distance, marriages, babies, friendship. All play massive roles in our lives. I've learned as I've gotten older to prioritize. That no longer are our girlfriends first place as they use to be. A hard lesson? At times. But one thing I can be absolutely thankful for is the fact that we still have this friendship. That we work at it. We could be better, but hey, we're doin alright. When I got the chance to visit April and meet Cooper for the first time, I had a bag full of emotions. Would things be the same? Would we sing dixie chicks again? Would we share our secrets, our innermost thoughts? Well, while the dixie chicks didn't get a performance this time around, rest assured other classics did. We re-kindled. Bonded and hushed our voices after 8pm. We learned that yes, we're definitely getting older. Wiser? We'll see. And most of all, the love this woman has shown to me for so many years has now appropriately been passed on to the most beautiful creation in her life. Mr. Cooper Raine.